Wednesday, October 15, 2014

I Am Evolved

There is this woozy, slightly shocked, dream like feeling that overtook me after the birth of baby Simba. This feeling is what caused me to replay, and talk about, the labor and birth of my 3rd child, over and over and over again. 

I had a csection with the twins and was able to successfully vbac with baby Simba. I was in labor with no cervical change for 3 days before I birthed him. It was painful. So very painful, and yes I caved and had an epidural at the very end, because I was so exhausted and needed some relief to try and rest, before I began pushing. Looking back on it I kind of wished I didn't get one because I feel like it slowed my pushing down.

He was born with the slight help of a vacuum, even though I think the vacuum was more for my midwives peace of mind, because I feel like I pushed sooooo hard to get him out that I did it all by myself. Plus I want all the credit :).

The process of labor and birth transformed me in ways I can't begin to describe. I feel empowered. I feel whole. I feel accomplished. I feel like labor was a spiritual experience that was so wonderful I wouldn't mind experiencing it again 4-5 years down the road. I felt like a goddess foe trusting my body to go through the birthing experience. I feel evolved.

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Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Baby Simba Has Arrived

On September 12, after three,( yes three) days of labor our third son was born. He was 6lbs 10.9 oz and 20 inches long. I had a successful VBAC which I will write about in detail as soon as I get a consistent spare moment. The boys love their new brother and have accepted him into the fold.  

And I am beyond happy with my expanded family.

baby simba, king, and ky

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Thursday, September 4, 2014

Right Now.....

I am sitting on the couch in my living room listening to Ky 'read' to King in their bedroom, and I can't help but think that right now is incredibly good. I, like most of the world, have a billion things to get done and probably a billion more things that I could complain about but, I honestly know that I have so much more to be grateful for. 

It is an interesting feeling to want to complain or stress and it just won't happen. I feel like I am experiencing the act of just being that is so refreshing and relaxing I am shocked that I haven't done this sooner. My love shared with me a quote from Yogi Bhajan that reads, “We’re human Beings, not human Doings.”, and that really blew my mind. 

I, for one, would definitely classify myself as a human doing, it is very hard for me to just 'be'. I feel like I have to be doing something at all times or I will look lazy. As you can see it has nothing to do with what I feel but how my inactivity will be perceived by others. I believe this is another turning point for me in my quest to live a more balanced and harmonious life. 

I will revel in these small moments where I feel completely relaxed and at ease and content. I will learn to just 'be' regardless of the situation, and make the transition from a human doing, to a human being.

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