I recently was on Google just a Googlin' away, looking up childbirthin' stuff and such, and I came across this awesome blog post about positive affirmations and a line from that post really stuck out to me. That line was "be kind to yourself". It seemed to shout out at me from the page and really made me think. How often do I run around my day, especially now that I'm pregnant and I don't have as much energy as I used to, and criticize myself for all that I don't get done?
How often do I feel stressed because there seems like there is so much to do and so little time? How often do I feel guilty because there seems to be a loose end left untied somewhere? How many times have I worried that I haven't given the twins or my love exactly what they needed, or spent enough time with them or my love? So many times I tell ya, so many times.
After 'be kind to yourself' became a repeated mantra chanted in my head, I realized I didn't even know what the word 'kind' even meant. I had to look it up on the Google.
2kind
adjective
: having or showing a gentle nature and a desire to help others : wanting and liking to do good things and to bring happiness to others
Woah! To be kind to myself means I want and like doing good things for myself and bringing myself happiness? Why does this seem like such a hard pill to swallow? Why does the thought of this immediately make me feel uncomfortable? As if in me being kind to myself would equal that I am being selfish?
As human beings we are not allowed to be kind to ourselves, it is something that is completely unaccepted and untaught. We are taught that it is acceptable to put others above ourselves till we suffocate our own wants and needs. Being a martyr is something that is looked upon highly and glorified, but we are missing a very important point in the midst of the self sacrifice.
We cannot be kind to others unless we are first kind to ourselves.
I want to be the absolute best me that I can be for my family and friends. I want to treat everyone close to me with love, kindness, compassion, patience, and respect, and to effectively do this I must first learn to be patient with myself , respectful of my desires and needs, compassionate of my mistakes and emotions, and above all else be very kind to myself; kindness I believe embodies all of these traits.
Today is the first day of me actively choosing to be kind to myself. To be aware of the thoughts that I allow myself to think and the expectations that I place upon myself. I am excited to see where this journey takes me.
